Always so busy.

Once again sorry for the updates. Trying to keep this thing updated and keep my life together is hard work. Haha. So I've been recently messaged by a few of my ex-husband's new wife's friends. In response to this I'd just like to add that everything I say in this blog is true to the best of my knowledge. And although it does not paint a very good picture of my ex-husband or his new wife that is not my intention. My intention is to put my story out there so that I can find some help either with getting my son or some support from other people who have gone through what I've gone through. Some more details about the legal situation, I know what state my son lives in, but no address. I do not have my ex's phone number and every person's number I do have will not answer. The only address I have is of his parent's but they have been no help to me. Our divorce and the child custody papers are all done in one state, I live in another state and he and my son live in a different state. Every lawyer I have talked to has pretty much told me to call a lawyer in the other state. I have a job but am not able to spend the 5,000+ dollars it takes to hire a decent lawyer. I have tried appealing to my ex-husband to at least let me talk to my son but he refuses to even speak to me. And last time I almost did have a lawyer willing to work with me he moved to a new state and cut contact completely. I do not know if my son is ok. All I have to go by is my ex's word, which I don't trust very much.

On the more emotional side to this battle I can say that I am a mother missing her son dearly. Getting through the day is hard sometimes. I work with the public and even seeing a child Jeff's age almost makes me cry. I am a good mother (no matter what my ex has to say about it). I love my baby boy more then anything in the whole world. And I would do anything I had to to get him back. To know that he was safe in my arms. I don't even have many pictures of him anymore because someone (my ex was the only one I know who had my password) had went onto my myspace account and deleted all of my pictures. And shortly after that my hard drive crashed and deleted the few I had seved on my computer. But his face remains vivid in my mind. I see it every night when I close my eyes. He is the love of my life, and I feel sorry for the people who took him from me. Sorry that they don't seem to understand the bond between a mother and her child.